[This is my third and final post of three in my “Vintage Wednesday” series on “Getting Ticked Without Sinning,” re-written/updated from a blogpost back in March of 2011.]
So what are some practical ways to overcome my negative emotions or anger when I am put under pressure, treated unfairly, or simply at the end of my rope? Below are some appropriate and Biblical recommendations for you to consider.
- Be on your guard. Jesus told his disciples to watch and pray so they wouldn't enter into temptation (Mark 14:38). Be aware of potential situations where you may be tempted to get angry and prepare yourself. Just like a problem acknowledged is a problem half solved, so you can mitigate your anger through mental and spiritual preparation.
- Center on God, not yourself.
Our default mechanism is to focus on how we feel and how we have been treated unjustly. Instead, ask God how He feels about the situation, and how He handled rejection and injustice when walking this earth. Since God designed our emotions ask Him how we should process them and how we should respond.
- Think and pray before you speak. Since our default is often to react rashly rather than take a step back and contemplate the situation, count to ten before responding and use that time to seek God on the issue. On "thinking," consider this quote by Viktor E. Frankl. On “praying,” ponder these words by the Apostle James.
- Decipher what is true. Often we react to the 90% or less of what is not true rather than consider the 10% or more of what is true. See if there's any truth (that you may need to hear!) in what set you off and focus on that.
- Express your emotions with wisdom. Avoid criticizing or placing blame by using "I" instead of “you” statements to describe the problem ("I felt this way when…"). Be respectful and specific.
- Engage a mediator (see Matthew 18:15-17). Find someone trustworthy that can help you work out the problem or bring resolution between you and another.
- Act to feel (see Psalm 34:14). Choose to forgive (see Ephesians 4:32) regardless of your feelings…those often follow after an act of the will.